When you are stuck for a gift to buy a loved one it is worth remembering that you cannot go far wrong with a book.  So it is with this in mind that I present you with two books written by good friends of mine.

First of all may I present Miss Fabia Cerra.  She was last seen turning Simon Cowell scarlett on X Factor with her raunchy Burlesque routine.  Since then she has been busy as an ambassador for www.bodygossip.org and running her own Burlesque class at R&R Frontline Studios in Oxford.  Oh, and she just got snapped up by www.curvymodels.co.uk

She had two books up for grabs:  Her life story, In Two Minds, available in print, and Ciao Bella! her Bible of style and beauty, now available as an e-book.  It will be available in print in 2012, if you can wait that long.

Secondly, I would like you to meet top chef Mike Saxon, culinary Jedi and author of Chef’s Tales.  Now Mike is a chef who has cooked his way around the world.  His culinary journey took him from Yorkshire to Toronto, the Bahamas, the Phillipines and Malaysia.  Whether he was delivering room service to naked people in Toronto, fighting off Phillipine rats or dodging bullets in Houston, work was never dull.

He met weird and wonderful characters such as the mysterious Mr Teppenyaki. Then there was  the psychotic French chef who would chase people around the kitchen with a meat cleaver.  And a whole cast of mentalists who, in spite of, or because of their peculiarities, produced the most amazing food known to man.

Both are well worth a read and now available via Amazon.co.uk

So the list as follows includes:

Cheap Gold Jewellery

Although the gypsy girl look may be the thing this season, this does not extend to looking like you take the money on the dodgem cars.  Gaudy, gold plated chunky jewellery is just an absolute no-no.

Any Practical Electrical Appliance

This includes vacuum cleaners, kettles, steamers, trouser presses, microwaves and so on.  A gift is supposed to be a gift. A token of love and affection, not a reminder that your trousers need ironing.  It is something you should want, and not really something you exactly need.

‘Sexy’ gifts

Or at least things we think are sexy.  This includes cheap, tacky underwear, sex toys, or other silly ‘erotic’ gifts.  The underwear thing seems to be the biggest bugbear.  I suppose it is better, then to get them a La Senza gift voucher and let them get on with it themselves.

‘Thoughtless’ gifts

Now this one is wide open.  It depends on how long you have been together I suppose and the gifts we buy are a measure of how much we listen to our better half.  Thoughtless gifts don’t have to be cheap, they can be expensive as hell, but even the things we want them to like just don’t tick the right boxes some days.  So the trick is this:  Pay attention to them, if in doubt, ask them what they want.  Good presents are rarely a surprise.

Well we are barely a month away from Christmas, the time when we traditionally buy gifts for our loved ones and they return the favour.  But it is also a time when we show how little we really know each other and what we want.

So, after a lot of research on Twitter, this is the short list of the things men don’t want for Christmas.

Jack Daniels Merchandise

We like Jack Daniels.  A lot, don’t get me wrong.  But we don’t need the wallet, the coasters, the key ring, the mousemat, the playing cards or the poster.  We just want a proper 70cl bottle of the good stuff and a glass.  To get through the week we are going to need it.

Chilli gifts

We love a good Chilli con carne or a curry.  But we don’t need chilli oil (we still have a bottle from last year), chilli plants, chilli chocolate, chilli sodding roulette games, or chilli beer.  Please, for heaven’s sake, just give us the beer.  It goes down well with the Jack Daniels.

Ice Road Truckers/Top Gear DVD

Just because we watch it on TV during the day doesn’t really mean we like it, it just means there is nothing else on.  Channel Dave devotes hours to perhaps one or two episodes of Top Gear that it seemingly shows on loop.  But do we want a DVD about a bloke driving a truck in the snow?  Nay, lass.

Christmas Jumpers

I know it is a tradition, but it is a crap one.  We have a draw full of gaudy knitwear stretching back to the eighties that even Oxfam wouldn’t accept.  Please, no more.

We are now deep into the season that hates our face more than any other.  Cold wind chafes and chaps our visage like never before.  In the dark, early mornings, shaving suddenly feels like the krypton factor.

So it is sometimes good to get back to basics with these things.  Fortunately our friends at Bluebeard’s Revenge have just the thing we need.

The short film was produced by Adelia TV, and stars Andy Dunn, a real bloke’s bloke and an expert barber, among his other jobs.

So check it out and keep an eye on the upcoming offers from Bluebeard’s Revenge range of gifts for Christmas.

Now in it’s tenth year the Birmingham Christmas Market has grown to encompass a mile of pavement and incorporates crafted goods, gifts, a small funfair, and some of the most amazing food and drink this side of the Siegfried line.

It stretches from New Street shopping precinct up to the city square, and then through on to Broad street.  To see the place you cannot help but suddenly feel very giddy and christmassy.  It just oozes a certain charm, in contrast to the desperation of the “110% off, buy buy buy!” from the department stores around it.

The sounds, lights and above all, the smells, take you right back to childhood and much, much happier times.  For a few hours, please soak up the atmosphere and forget the recession.

Among the hand crafted gifts you will find Christmas baubles and decorations, toys for the children, ornaments and arts.

For me, the real reason to go is for the food, which is a post in itself.  The German’s specialize in street food, that can be eaten on the move.  Subsequently there are Frankfurters and Hamburgers galore in stall after stall.  Believe me, their burgers are a far cry from the ones you see in McDonalds.  Their confectionery is a wonder of colour and taste.  Not only that, they have huge Steins of wheat beer, warm cider and mulled wine.

Being central to Birmingham, it has excellent car parking, but it will cost you a fair price.  Avoid the Pallisades, aim a little further out and park up near the market where it is cheaper.

Please take extra care of your belongings, and be very aware of pickpockets in such a tightly packed area.  The city centre is well stocked with cash-points.  I did not note any first aid point in the area, but there may be one.  As far as toilets go, you may have to make use of the nearest pub/coffee shop/department store.

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Last Saturday I took a day out to go visit the BirminghamVintage Festival, which was taking place at the Jewelery Quarter in Birmingham.

Rickie Josen, whom I have mentioned before,  is an organizer of many events in the city, including the Birmingham Writers Club and Jelly, an entrepreneur’s networking morning.

She had gathered together, in one urban space, clothes designers, artists, photographers, baristas and bakers alike.

By the time I got there I was starving so my first call was Chitty’s Cupcake company’s stall.  Rebecca Chitty has been supplying cakes to Birmingham’s hungry residents for quite some time now and her cake decorating classes have been a huge success.  For more details, check out her website.

While I was still licking the icing off my fingers I browsed through the art stall.  Art Angel sells framed sketches of the 1940-1960 period.  Marie Nemeth, originally from Rochdale, has a BA in fine art and made her name with small, simple sketches of film stars and celebrities of yesteryear.

Nearby Keith Bloomfield was snapping away with the biggest camera I have ever seen.  However, he said it only came out on special occasions.  His preferred camera of choice these days was his iphone!  Quite remarkable how mobile technology has become the choice of everybody these days.  To see more of his video art check out his website here.

Further back Bianca Rosa had a stall full of curiosities, jewels and gloves of all kinds.  They also do parties at Asha’s restaurant.

Last on my list were the lovely ladies of Dress Your Soul.  These fashionistas had stalls and rails full of dresses, furs, coats, hats and cushions.  All in ornate and pristine condition.  They liked to pick their items to sell by hand.  Also they had a good eye for future fashions and their astute eye for next season’s ‘must have’ item has served them well.

For the kids there was also face painting, courtesy of Midlands Face Painting.

Finally I caught up with Rickie Josen herself for a coffee and a chat about how it all came about.

I wanted something to happen in the Jewellery Quarter – on my doorstep, that highlighted the creativity and talent we have here. I’m aware of some ever increasing great Vintage events in the city but a lot of traders come from out of town. I want something that is predominantly West Midlands based, an event that promotes local traders and helps them succeed.

With BVF, my hope is that small businesses excel with repeat business and to this end I urge them to have their name displayed, have flyers and cards and generally let people know they have a lot to offer.

In addition to creating revenues for our local fledgling businesses, I want every man, woman and child to have a wonderful afternoon that takes them to a bygone era and the music theme plays a big part in this.

Rebecca Dakin is a relationship coach with experience like no other.  As an escort with nearly  a decade’s experience she knows men better than most, and what makes us tick.  She also knows better than most where we go right, and often, so terribly wrong.

Her tell-all autobiography is now available by clicking here.  I had a read of two of her sample chapters.  The first described a typical work-date.  I found the account to be both articulate and honest.  The second chapter accounted for some of the reasons why certain men go to prostitutes.  The motives are many and highly varied.  Bad husbands are always derided but a fact often overlooked is that there are a lot of bad, cold or uncaring wives too.

Some of the stories of clients and their sheer cheek made me laugh on several occasions.  Also it seems those in the sex-trade are often underestimated intellectually, and indeed morally.

So she finally decided to put her knowledge to good use and re-launch herself as a relationship coach.  Her new book ‘Why Husbands Stray’ seeks to dispel some of the myths around infidelity,  it’s causes and repercussions.

After she had some attention from the mainstream media things began to gather speed for Rebecca.

So I contacted this stunning lady  for a quick chat:

How did you get into this line of work?

I used to buy FHM and Loaded and in the back there was an advert looking for escorts.  I signed up, and off I went.

Do you worry that your story may encourage more impressionable ladies into a highly risky occupation?

Belle de Jour TV series is completely glamourising the industry, and that is where the risk and concern is.  If you read the whole of my book it is very balanced in my opinion.  I have talked about the negative side of escorting, and the dangers.  I made a point of saying that I consider myself very lucky, and that anyone entering into the profession should do so with a lot of thought and care.  I say in my book that the minimum age should be at least 25 and not 18.  Girls will chose escorting anyway.  Reading my book teaches them to do it with care, and highlights the dangers and that can only be a good thing.

What is the most romantic thing a guy has done for you?

The most romantic thing a guy has done for me, when I was about 20, my boyfriend at that time wrote songs and poetry for me.

When did you feel it was time to move on to other challenges?

I starting thinking about finishing escorting when I was 32 I think.  I was conscious that there was no age limit, I have friends doing it in their fifties.  I want to settle down and have a family, and be successful in another business.

What was your most embarrassing moment?

One of my most embarrassing moments was when I had to make a point of telling someone that they have poor hygiene for not brushing their teeth, when in fact they didn’t have any!

You can keep up with Rebecca via her website http://www.rebeccadakin.com or on Twitter

Those nice people from Hairbond sent me another parcel of goods this week, including items from their new range of products.  It doesn’t take much to turn me into a little boy on Christmas morning.

First of all I had a go with their shampoo, which came in a nice squeezy tube.  It had a lovely fruity smell, nicely thick and gave a good lather.  It can stay.

After that I gave the conditioner a try.  Normally if I am taking two bottles into the shower, the other one is vodka.  But I digress.  I had to read the instructions, apply and leave for a while.  It had a nostalgic aroma of passionfruit and orange cordial.

While I waited for it to work I attacked my stubble with my King of Shaves Razor and a healthy dollop of Bluebeard’s Revenge.

After rinsing and drying my hair it felt lighter and had a whole new shine, which drew an admiring glance from the better half.  She has since been converted to Hairbond products too, nice one.

Moving on, I needed to tame my fuzzy barnet into some neater spikes, so what could I use?  Hair Cream.  They also call it design professional hair cream.  At first it felt like putty and I had to work it with my hands to make it more pliable.  But soon it was doing it’s magic and making my hair stand up like good little soldiers.  It didn’t stick in clumps, but more like a looser manageable group.

It too had a fruity aroma, not like the usual chemical smell I have become used to.  So am I converted to Hairbond?  Yes and yes again.  A high quality product for the 21st century, and I can’t wait to see it succeed.

For more information and to place your order please check out their website http://www.hairbond.co.uk

Britain’s Got Talent has been known for many golden moments, Cher Lloyd’s tantrums, Susan Boyle’s amazing voice to name but two.  But for sheer visual impact one lady always stood out.  Personally I always liked her for making Simon Cowell’s facial expression change from boredom to sheer amazement in less than a minute.

Step forward Miss Fabia Cerra

If you didn’t catch her act the first time it was repeated on youtube endlessly for the viewing public.  Now, this is the first time a burlesque performer had appeared on BGT so there was some doubt as to what to expect.  Needless to say her performance titillated, stunned, amused and amazed the people of this fair land.

In the wake of the spotlight came huge, and scarily persistent media interest, particularly from  The News of the World (you remember them).

But the fifteen minutes of fame tick away fast and she has been working hard.  She consolidated her success by moving into new areas of business, such as perfume.  A lot of her spare time is spent in charitable works and volunteer projects, such as Abdabs, a youth community theatre project based in Witney.  She has even had a letter from Buckingham palace, but more on that later.

To see Fabia’s outstanding performance please click here

I still love the look on Simon Cowell’s face, it was the only time he cracked a smile.  Lucky that desk was there, eh,  Simon?

So I finally caught up with Fabia for a chat this week.

What drew you towards the Burlesque style of performance?

The media don’t follow my every move I have a PR manager who sends off press releases when necessary about my latest project. I’m a local talent contest judge for StarCatchers! See facebook for more details. Ive been judging since 2009, and, I love it!

What were your thoughts on the News of the World’s demise?

The news of the screws were a nightmare when they interviewed me over the phone, they kept pushing me and, asked to interview me at home I agreed but, they ended up asking me to lunch and, I said “NO!” They wouldn’t my drive way until they had a hard copy of my autobiography In 2 Minds www.chipmunkapublishing.com

I had to call ITV press office and, the police!!! They soon moved off my drive back to London. I’m glad they shut the paper down they are evil bastards! and, Karma came around a bit them where it hurt! in their pockets…

I feel so sad for the families who were lied to by the paper and, mislead to thinking their loved ones were still alive…

So how is life at the minute?

I love my life now and, I’m so grateful to Mr_Simon Cowell for believing in me, my life has changed as Im doing what Ive always wanted to do with my life now. I’m not rich but, I feel rich because, I’m so happy which is priceless.

To see more of Fabia and her forthcoming projects check out her site    http://www.fabiacerraofficial.com

Or keep up with her on Twitter find her here:    http://www.twitter.com/fabiaburlesque

And special thanks to http://www.blushingboudoir.co.uk for the cover photos.  Check out their work.

I had a bit of news from my mates at Bluebeard’s Revenge the other day.  They are now supplying their product to Menkind, one of the leading chains of male-interest shops in the country.  Now you can buy Bluebeard from their online store or any of eight different locations as far apart as Cardiff and Essex.

Menkind themselves are an interesting little shop, full of buzzing little helicoptors, jedi-knight robes and grooming products aplenty.  Bluebeard’s Revenge will fit nicely on their shelves and hopefully do well.

Paul Kraftman, Managing Director for Menkind says: “Mankind have been delighted to be selected as a stockist for the Bluebeard’s Revenge range of products and look forward to promoting this brand in our shops and online store.”

Mankind will be stocking the full range, including shaving cream, post-shave balm, Mach 3 razor, cut-throat razor, badger-hair shaving brush and luxury shaving gift set.

Bluebeard’s Revenge is famous for it’s secret ingredient, Decelerine, which reduced beard-growth over time.